The Quiet Grief of Outgrowing Your Old Life
There’s a strange kind of grief that doesn’t get talked about much. It’s not dramatic, it doesn’t announce itself, and it doesn’t require funerals or casseroles or whispered condolences. It’s the grief of outgrowing a life that you once wanted so badly. Maybe you’ve had moments where you look around and thinking about how you should feel grateful, but somethings feels off. Or maybe you realize that the relationships, beliefs, routines, or identities that once fit your perfectly now feel just a little too small. You can make it work, but that too feels off. Constricting.
Can You Heal Religious Trauma Without Losing Your Faith?
For many people, faith begins as a source of belonging and community. It can offer guidance, purpose, and a sense of belonging to something bigger and greater than yourself. Faith can provide comfort through the hardest seasons and something that can steady you.
The Difference Between Coping and Healing
You’ve done the hard work of surviving. This might have looked like long nights, silent days, and uncertainty about what life looks like after everything has changed. You’ve read all the books, listened to all the podcasts, and tried shifting your routines, and maybe outwardly it appears as though you’ve got it all together. But sometimes, even after all the effort, you notice that you still feel stuck. You’re not falling apart, but you’re not free and thriving either. That’s the quiet in-between space where many people find themselves: where coping has done it’s job, but healing hasn’t begun yet.
Sober but Still Numb: When Quitting Isn’t the Whole Story
At first, you expect sobriety to feel similar to waking up. The light is supposed to pour in, right? You might image early mornings with fresh energy and pride that carries you through temptation. And sometimes, it does start that way! But for many people, that light never fully arrives, or it fades too quickly. You wake up sober, but still feel detached. You’re clear-headed, but feel hollow. Life is sharper, but it doesn’t feel meaningful.
Anxious Attachment or Anxiety? How to Tell the Difference and Begin Healing
It’s a common question I hear in therapy: “Is this just anxiety or something deeper?”
When your heart races after not getting a text back or you feel a wave of panic when your partner pulls away, it can feel impossible to tell. Anxiety and anxious attachment can look and feel like fear, overthinking, and emotional intensity. But, they grow from different places.
What Your Nervous System Does After Betrayal and How to Calm It
When trust is broke through infidelity, deception, or another form of betrayal, the impact goes far beyond than just hurt feelings. Betrayal disrupts your entire nervous system, often leaving the betrayed feeling unsafe in their own bodies long after the event. Many of my clients describe the experience like they “living on the edge” or that they no longer feel like themselves. These reactions are not overreactions. They are survival responses! Understanding what your nervous system does in the aftermath of betrayal can help you begin to make sense of your response and how to take steps towards healing.
Why Hyperfixations Can Be Healing: Turning Passions Into Coping Skills
Have you ever found yourself diving deep into a hobby, TV show, or niche interest - so much so that it feels like your whole world for a period of time? That’s what many people call a hyperfixation. While the word is often associated with ADHD, autism, and neurodivergence communities, hyperfixations aren’t exclusive to any one group! In fact, they’re a completely human experience, and they can be fun, therapeutic, and even a valuable coping skills.
The Link Between Anxious Attachment and Self-Worth
When you care deeply about connection, it can feel like your entire sense of self is dependent on how others respond to you. If you have an anxious attachment style, you might recognize the push and pull of wanting closeness but also fearing rejection. It might often feeling like you’re “too much” or “not enough” depending on how those around you react.
Finding Belonging When You Feel Like the “Black Sheep”
In every family, workplace, or social circle, there often seems to be a “black sheep” - meaning a person who doesn’t quite fit the mold, who unapologetically questions traditions, loudly or quietly challenges the narrative, or who feels slightly removed from everyone else. If you’ve ever carried that label (or quietly felt it), you know it can be isolating and painful.
But here’s the truth: being the “black sheep” isn’t really about being flawed or unworthy. It’s often about having the courage, or the necessity, to be different.
Conrad vs. Jeremiah: When a Shutdown Feels like a Rejection
If you’ve been following The Summer I Turned Pretty (like me), you’ve most likely had very strong feelings about the love triangle between Belly, Conrad, and Jeremiah. Some people root for Jeremiah’s open-heartedness and outgoing personality, while others feel pulled towards Conrad’s brooding intensity.
But what makes Conrad controversial at times, and yet so compelling, is his safety protocol of shut-down.
When Conrad gets flooded emotionally, instead of opening up, he retreats. He pulls away from Belly, leaving her hurt and confused, and questioning what she means to him. To someone on the outside, this looks like coldness or disinterest. But underneath, Conrad’s withdrawal is a defense mechanism… which is where fiction mirrors real life.
Is It Normal to Stay After Infidelity? What Therapists Want You to Know
When infidelity happens, your world might feel like it’s falling apart. You might find yourself between an overwhelming desire to leave and a voice in your head asking if staying is even possible. People around you might be quick to give you feedback - “once a cheater, always a cheater” or “you have to forgive if you want to move forward.” But the truth is far more complicated. It is normal to stay after infidelity? The short answer: yes. Healing and decision-making after betrayal don’t follow a linear path.
Why I Use Art and Music in Therapy - Even Virtually
Therapy isn’t always about the right words. Sometimes it’s about the feeling in your chest when a song hits the nerve you didn’t know was raw, or the way a color in a painting captures the ache you’ve been carrying and haven’t been able to name. That’s why I incorporate your experience of your favorite artwork or music artist, especially with clients who feel things deeply, are spiritually disoriented, or relationally stuck. These tools don’t replace talking, they deepen it.
Feyre, Nesta, and the Spectrum of Trauma Responses: An ACOTAR Deep Dive
If you’ve read the A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas series, you understand that the emotions in these stories runs deep: love, grief, rage, sisterhood, family, and the weight of survival. Beneath the battles and mates, there is something all of us can relate to on a human level: how trauma shows up. And as the story tells, Feyre, Nesta, and Elain all experience their trauma in a different kind of way.
Am I Having a Quarter-Life Crisis? Or Am I Finally Waking Up?
And still - there is something in your body that isn’t right. A quiet sense of dislocation. A feeling like maybe you’re living slightly adjacent to your real life.
This doesn’t mean you’re broken or something is wrong with you, but maybe that you are finally waking up.
Purity Culture Wasn’t Pure: Healing the Shame That Has Never Been Yours
If you’ve grown up in any kind of organized religion, there’s always a moment with the dreaded topic of sex or intimacy comes up as a teenager. You’re told that sex is bad, wanting it is bad, and listening to your earthly or bodily desires is bad. You were taught to wait, to deny yourself, and more importantly, to watch yourself.
Popular BookTok Characters and Their Attachment Styles: A Deep Dive Into Fictional Relationships
If you’re anything like me, you’ve fallen into the rabbit hole that is BookTok. It’s a place for literary lovers to connect with characters that resonate deeply with them. Beyond the gripping tales and romances, many characters embody complex psychological patterns that shape how they connect with others and themselves.
When You’re Feeling Overwhelmed/Activated During an Argument
Personally, and professionally, I’ve noticed that seldomly do we find ourselves able to argue without our emotions getting the best of us
What is Self-Compassion, and Why Is It Important?
The word “compassion” is not a rare one. In fact, I’m sure you’ve heard this word somewhere this past week already!
What to Talk About Before Getting Married
Congratulations! You and your partner have made a huge step in your relationship, one that is exciting and uniting, and brings about new changes in your current relationship